Week 10 is in the books and the fake football season is entering the home stretch. We only have 4 weeks of the regular season left and since we’ve had as many Power Rankings as Abel free agent acquisitions, we figured it’s time to check in.
Guillotine League
There are 6 owners remaining and South was the only CNK member to get
chopped since our last check in. Rosters
are starting to get more stacked than South’s mom and there are no more idle
owners to take the fall each week. There
are still 4 CNKers remaining and Mitch sits atop the heap from a weekly scoring
aspect, but as South proved, a team of elite players can shit the bed on any
given week. Riley, Seth and Finken also
still have their heads attached but Seth’s neck is looking a bit choppy with
several byes on his roster this week.
Mitch and Finken were the only ones to use waivers this week so everyone else
must’ve been studying Abel’s MasterClass seminar on FAAB.
Abel explaining the Guillotine League waiver system.
Best Ball League
If anyone is still checking the best ball league, it’s apparently still
going on. Seth has by far the most
points but sits in 3rd place due to record. The perennial master of
how-do-I-even-login-to-check-my roster leagues is down to a single QB, so it
could be a challenge to compete going forward.
Everyone else is real close together in terms of weekly scoring
including South. However, he sits at a
lowly 1-9 and is probably redirecting all of his Southy luck towards righting
the ship in the only league that actually matters.
And with that, let’s get back to our dynasty league. Always remember, the NFL season is fleeting and soon it will be at an end. Outside of Kyle, we have a very competitive race to the finish with everyone having a shot to claim a playoff spot. The dynamic of adding a win/loss against the median score has evened some things out all-the-while removing all the fun and randomness of a fake football game. We’ll try and look at how that’s effected everyone’s record thru this PR.
Week 10 was crazy and resulted in a very entertaining MNF match that
affected all 4 of our games. Somehow the
Broncos held on to beat the Bills in Buffalo and the 4th quarter
swung 3 of the 4 matchups. And two of
these matchups were decided by a margin so thin, Trump’s hair made a Truth
Social post about how it’s the thinnest thing that has eve been thin. Chris lost because the Broncos ran the time
all the way down before a hurried kick and Riley lost because of Russell
Wilson’s more-than-necessary kneel downs.
South lost because neither team could throw the ball worth a damn to
their star WRs. Just an incredible
finish.
Well at least some of us are...
But enough with that and on with the Power Rankings…
1. Fuck It Three – After rolling thru the first half of the season,
South has lost two straight. And it’s
not just that we lost two, it’s that he lost them to Riley and then Kyle. **Spoiler alert, they will be much lower in
this list. And he’s lost against the
median score as well both times. Unheard
of for Garrett. Lamar hasn’t been his
usual cheat code, accounting for only 2 of the Ravens 12 TDs in the past 3
weeks, and several of his key guys have either been on bye or injured. But he’s starting to get them all back this
week and it’s a good thing too as he’s got Lansink and Finken up next. He had better get his act together if he
plans to keep his perch high above the rest of the league come playoff time.
2. Rollin’ 4 Deep – Sources close to the situation say that after a 3
game losing streak, Finken was just about to hit the reset/sell button on the
season and battle for draft food rights.
However, he’s been on a tear recently, winning 5 in a row posting median
wins in each of those as well. That’s
vaulted him into a tie with South in the standings. His two rookies, Gibbs and Kinkaid, have led
this charge along with Howell filling the 2nd QB spot. He posted (and needed) high points this week
and was lucky to do so with a 0.0 from Dotson and single digits from three
others. It will not be easy to hold that
spot though as Mitch, then South come to town and we’ll find out if he’s a true
contender or just two kids standing on each other’s shoulders in a trench coat.
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| Finken pretending to be a contender. |
3. Play It Backwards – Mitch looked poised to take control of the
league last we checked in but a 2-game skid ended only by sneaking by Abel this
week put the brakes on that thought. He
flirted with his first ever sub-100 game but was saved by yet another Zach
Wilson INT that was returned on the 2 yard line giving Ekeler a walk-in
TD. No one has been hurt more than Mitch
by the median scoring as he now has 3 losses against the median when he won the
actual matchup. Leaving Hock on the
bench didn’t help his cause last week and getting Kupp and Adams would help him
tremendously. If he can get past Finken
this weekend, he will take control of his playoff destiny. Otherwise, his squad could be could become
irrelevant for the next several years.
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| Not yet Mitch, but soon...according to some... |
4. If We’re Using Logic – Chris had chalked it up to a win
already. Comfortably going thru the
evening getting his husbandly chores done and putting his kids to bed. He even sidled up to Mel with that look in
his eye to celebrate another fantasy victory.
All he needed was for Josh Allen to have a decent night and not throw
Kinkaid too many passes. Well Josh Allen
turned into Nathan Peterman and only managed to throw a TD to Kinkaid. The rest was history. Now he has to try and regroup and face South
in order to stay in playoff contention. With
a healthy JT, a broken Akers and a Gus Bus getting all the tuddies, there’s
nothing standing between Chris and his 22nd playoff berth…and Chris,
no that probably wasn’t your dumbest loss ever, even to
Finken…#StatCorrectionChamp
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5. I’m Out – Abel had his chance get closer to the last playoff
spot. Mitch posted a down week and all
he needed to do was play the other QB in the MN-NO game. Dobbs lit it up for his Vikings while Carr
crashed into a freeway median. Abel now
has Riley and Kyle on deck and he better make those count if he wants to stay
in it. Posting 4 W’s in those matchups
are a necessity and we all know who he should turn to for help if his Carr is
still smashed up…
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| Abel's playoff hopes could come crashing down. |
6. Smells Low – Much like Chris, Riley felt quite good as MNF played
out. Not
threesome-in-a-sex-shop-with-a-cock-ring good (shame on you all for missing an
epic Riley story on Wednesday night), but pretty good. Wilson was lighting it up (for him, which
means slightly above average) and Javonte was playing back up to form. As Denver drove down for the winning FG, he
got just enough from Wilson to put him over the top. But then there was the clock problem. And the coaching staff had Wilson kneel a few
times to burn timeouts and Riley lost just enough to give Seth the win. It’s the story of his season as he’s been one
of the most volatile teams. He swept the
season series against South along with having 3 median scores wins with a loss and
2 median score losses with a win. But
he’s going to have to score some points and get some wins or he’ll be more tied
up than he was in a sex harness at a sex shop in San Fran.
7. Ah It’s Early – Should Seth be higher than Riley after just beating him and winning 2 straight? Yeah maybe but you’ll have to take that up with the Power Rankings committee. Seth’s QBs were the key to his title last year and they are starting to come alive again. We’re just not sure if it’s too little, too late…much like his neckbeard. He could really affect the playoff picture if he can get by Kyle this weekend. He gets to finish with Lazer, South and then Finken to try and sneak into that 4-hole. And if there's something Seth's good at, it's finishing strong while coming in the back door.
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| Seth getting back into contention after this weekend. |
8. Off Suit 10s – As Kyle stated, at this point of a lost season, the way his team finishes could be a confidence-builder for his young team. They’re playing hard and starting to see the results. And this was quite apparent in the upset of the year, with OS10s taking down FIT. It wasn’t pretty but Stroud, Bijon, LaPorta, JSN and London all look to be keepers. Kyle can’t make the playoffs realistically but he’s playing all three of the teams vying trying to get into the top 4 so he could really mess someone’s plans up quick. He’s in “who cares” territory with nothing to lose, those teams has better beware.
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| Kyle scaring those in playoff contention. |
